I touched on it a little already, but Cathy and I also talked about the different rolls of everyone’s life. For me I essentially have 3 different rolls; mom, wife, Sami. Seems easy enough, right? NO! Through talking with Cathy I realized that I had somehow gotten stuck in the mom roll and wasn’t willing to get unstuck. I like being a mom. It’s who I am and it’s what I do. But it’s also ok to be a wife and be Sami. But how, I ask, do you do that. Well, as discussed above, I need to make a decision to change (check) and then implement the changes (double check). Well almost. So I learned how to be a better wife and implemented those changes and saw how it worked so nicely.
So then, I decided to take more Sami time and start exercising again. What a good thing that has been for me. I do it during the day when the kids are more likely to ask questions but I’m doing it and it feels good and for the most part they leave me alone. They take advantage of the time and use it to do what they want. I think it works for all of us.
So now I still needed to figure out the mom roll. Since it is no longer the complete focus, I needed to focus on that which was most important. I started to focus more on what the kids have to say and what they want to do. I have nipped the back talking in the bud (since I’m a person now too, Sami, I need to be talked to nicely). We have set up a weekly date night where each kid, in turn, gets a date with mom or dad. I’ve decided that if I promise or even say something, I follow through. Even if that means I’m up all night. I’m done saying I’ll do something and then not do it and have a wonderful excuse for my kids the next day. All these things have had such an impact on our lives as a whole. It’s been a month now, and I can slowly see a difference. I can see more of the vision of what a happy, eternal family would be like.
Sami, I love all your epiphanies. They are great lessons to be learned and I’m glad you shared them. (Got any more?!) I am definitely keeping these things in mind.
So you are completely over whatever it was the was wiping you out after you did any sort of exercise? I am glad to hear that! I think it’s great that you are taking better care of yourself and that you are happy with the changes that you have made. I find that it’s nice to set goals and reach them, the frustrating part is that you have to CONSTANTLY be re-setting goals!